We’ve been studying the relationship between men and women, specifically in marriage, over the last few weeks. Now that we’ve explored the primary wants and needs of men, it’s time to examine the needs of women.
Ephesians 5 lays out the relationship between husband and wife in terms of authority and submission. This passage has so often been misinterpreted. We often see “submission,” the role of the wife, as something that devalues her and gives the husband license to dominate and control.
Instead, we see a Biblical standard for leadership that’s rooted in service. Remember how Jesus washed His disciples feet, right before He submitted to the Father’s will by going to the cross? He was a servant leader. He knew that submission didn’t make Him less than, but pointed others to His Father.
The first thing a woman wants in a man is a man who dares to act like Jesus—who dares to lead by serving. When she finds such a man, she’ll be willing to submit herself to His leadership. Submission allows both spouses to be on the same page, so that they can advance toward their God-given purpose as one!
Every woman also needs love. Again, love isn’t a feeling, but sacrifice for the good of another person. Jesus loved others sacrificially throughout His life on earth, and asks us to do the same. When a husband is a servant leader who sacrificially lays down his life for his wife, both his wife and the world will take notice.
Likewise, when a wife submits to her husband, placing her trust in Him and allowing Him to lead, the world will take notice.
Dr. Derek Grier